Things that make me uncomfortable...

• Having not showered for too long. 'Nuff said. (Don't point the finger of scorn... We've all been guilty at some point.)
  
• Snorkeling. I feel very uneasy in the fishes' territory. I'll give it another shot someday when Blake and I go somewhere snorkel-worthy just because I know he would love snorkeling, but I'm not sure I'll feel any different about it when that time comes. You stay on your side of the pond, little fishies, and I'll stay on my side...
• Getting Trained. Being the new guy on the job is always tough, no matter what line of work you're talking. (Motherhood included. I've said it many times in the last two and a half months, but there's a very sharp learning curve when it comes to becoming a parent. Even with all of the uncomfortable stretching, learning, and growing, the beautiful little bundle you get out of it is certainly worth the leap!)
• Conflict. It makes me want to run and hide, crawl into a fetal position, or stick my head in the ground. This is something I'm going to need to get over before raising my kids. Either that, or I'll get over it while raising my kids.
• The Unknown. I wish like crazy we knew where we were moving at some point this month. (G&G will be home from their mission June 1st!) At least then I could make plans or get used to certain ideas. I can be flexible on a dime if I need to, but I prefer to reframe my paradigms in advance.
• Driving without already knowing where I'm going. Kind of like in the last point, I want to know when I'm going to need to turn well before I need to turn. I also don't like driving with a car-full of high-energy people that are talking really loudly. (Hmm, doesn't that sound like a minivan full of children?...) I remember times in high school when I was the driver and had to ask everybody to take it down one energy level for the sake of my nerves. ("You don't know what I suffah!")
• The misuse of money. We are so blessed. This truly is the promised land. Our bounteous resources and affluence are not merely gifts from God, they are a stewardship for which we will be held accountable. I'm not saying we should live in sackcloth and ashes and give all our money to the poor. But I get uncomfortable at the thought of having a home or a car or a wardrobe or whatever that when I stand before the Lord would cause him to say, "You spent what I gave you on this? Didn't you see me naked, or hungry, or thirsty, or sick, or imprisoned? Why didn't you minister unto me? 'Then shall he answer them saying, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye did it not to one of the least of these, ye did it not to me' (Matthew 25:45)." I never, ever, EVER want to experience that. Nothing in this world would be worth having that painful interaction.
• The misuse of time. Like money, the time we're given is a resource, blessing, and stewardship. I struggle often to use my time wisely and to its maximum potential, and I have a sick feeling that a very similar conversation to the one above is just as possible in respect to how we use our time. It is a weakness that I'm trying hard to work on, but goodness me, it's an uphill climb! (But a climb worth making, to be sure.) Aside from making me uncomfortable, I just get cranky when I look back on my day and see how much time has been wasted on meaningless, stupid things. Thus, my New Year's Resolution to log on to facebook less than 100 times this year. That has blessed my life so far this year.
• Unrealized potential. Sometimes I wonder if I'm doing or being or becoming as much as I could be or ought to be. At times when I wonder, I often think of an exchange on The King and I. Anna is packing up her bags to go back to England after finding out the King is dying. Her son Louie asks her, "Was he as a good a King as he could have been?" I appreciate Anna's response: "I don't think any man has ever been as good a King as he could have been. But this one tried. He tried very hard." I may not be as good a mom, or a wife, or a daughter, or a friend as I could have been, but we're in mortality--hardly the setting for our finest hours if you ask me. It's comforting to know that I have all of eternity to progress and realize my full potential. And in the meantime, I'm trying. I'm trying very hard and doing the best that I can. And I am growing and developing and realizing my potential--small steps at a time. I think one of my favorite scriptures sums it up well:  "That which is of God is light; and he that receiveth light, and continueth in God, receiveth more light; and that light groweth brighter and brighter until the perfect day" (D&C 50:24). The "perfect day" is within all of our reach as we receive light and continue in God.