Darkness and Light

I made a big mistake today. I watched a movie that I knew going into it was not virtuous or lovely. In fact, I knew there was a great likelihood that it was going to hurt my spirit, and it did. There was nothing sexual in the movie, and it contained less swearing than even some of the crude animated PG movies that have been released.  But the violence and inhumanity that was so pervasive through the entire film literally made my stomach sick and chased my spirit into a corner of my soul where it cowered just wanting to feel safe and loved. So many people watched and loved and raved about this movie when it came out several years ago. I know some of my readers by name who love the film, particularly for its powerful portrayal of good versus evil. When the movie was first released, I had a friend who knew me well tell me to never see it; they were familiar enough with me and my spirit to know that the moral implications of the movie would not offset the damage it would do to my spirit and my view of the world. They were right.

I knew throughout the movie that watching it was a mistake. But I didn't leave. (Sometimes I wonder what happened to the brave girl I was in high school.) Anyway, right when the movie ended I immediately started searching for something to invite feelings of safety and security and goodness into my heart--something that might comfort my spirit with the light of truth. This is what I found because someone posted it to facebook.

I know it's okay that I made a mistake today. I'm not berating myself. I know that I can repent and recommit to honoring the Light of Christ and the gift of the Holy Ghost that warns me of temporal and spiritual hazards and guides me into paths where I can feel safe in the light of uplifting things. I am grateful that Heavenly Father trusts me enough to give me "sunrise revelation"--that He trusts me enough to let me make mistakes and learn from them and be changed by them. And I'm so very, eternally grateful for the atonement of Jesus Christ and that I don't have to be bound by and damned for my mistakes and sins--that I can be picked up and rescued by the Savior's love and move forward as a clean person renewed and resolved to be truer to my covenants, convictions, and testimony--that I have to opportunity to grow in light and continue in light.

"That which is of God is light; and he that receiveth light, 

and continueth in God, receiveth more light; 

and that light groweth brighter and brighter until the perfect day."

-Doctrine and Covenants 50:24

I humbly and gratefully look forward to the perfect day.